TW: This story may contain triggering and traumatising elements, such as sexual assault.
It was really a dark moment when I experienced that. It all started when I was on Grindr looking for sex. I was having a dry season during that time so it was really hard. What made matters worse, work was miserable. So back to the story. It was in the morning when one man messaged me and asked if I wanted to have sex. I was hesitant at first, but seeing how I wanted to do so, I decided to meet him.
After finishing my gym session, I stopped by his place. As I walked there, my gut told me that something felt wrong. I denied that feeling and just went with it. The usual: we stripped ourselves naked and whatnot, and started to do foreplay and finally penetration. While he was trying to penetrate me, he said he felt uncomfortable wearing the condom. Without any sign of warning, he just removed his condom and penetrated me straight. I was shocked and uncomfortable, I kept squirming away as he tried to penetrate me. Somehow, he ended up ejaculating, but thankfully not inside me. Straight away, I went to the bathroom to clean, dress and pack my stuff to leave. He blocked me afterwards on Grindr and in my mind I thought “good riddance.”
Ever since that experience, I was really scared that he might have HIV and infected me. I was really concerned and decided to research more information, and even asked my pharmacist friend if he knew of any medication to prevent this from happening. That was when I found out about this medication called PEP (Post-Exposure Prophylaxis), which must be taken within 72 hours. As I dug deeper, I discovered a foundation that can help with such cases and thankfully, they are LGBTQ+ friendly. Since the very next day was a Saturday, I went straight to the foundation to get tested and receive more information on how to obtain the drug. The people there were very kind and asked me questions while trying to keep me calm. After all the questioning and testing, they provided me with documentation and told me to go to a clinic to receive the medication.
Upon reaching there, I was greeted by a doctor who was also very kind and asked me to share everything that I have experienced. The doctor assured me that I will be fine. Strangely enough though, throughout this experience, I was very calm and level headed. I was told that the medication I got is the cheaper variant, which may cause some side effects. I had no choice but to purchase that as the other medication was not within my budget. I was instructed by the doctor to take this medication for the next 30 days at the same time each day. He also offered to provide me support via WhatsApp, which I was very grateful for.
Throughout the 30-days period of taking that medication, I experienced morning sickness because my digestion has always been weak. I even got rashes at one point. I suspected it was the medication combined with the seafood I ate that caused it as I never had issues with seafood before. The doctor checked with me from time to time, but when he asked if I was alright, I always replied that I am. It was strange because I thought I should be scared, but somehow, I always knew that panic would help no one and finding solutions instead were more important. It never occurred to me how calmly I was going through this until after it ended. After the 30-days period ended, I went back to the clinic to do another test and the results were negative. The doctor advised me to do the test again in 3 months’ time, which I did — the test still showed negative.
This experience has really taught me a huge lesson of being careful with people and not to trust them easily. Due to my inquisitive nature, I was really thankful that I managed to save myself from this problem. Also, the lack of panicking and seeking for solutions is what really helped me survive till this day.